Trust and Safety

A threesome asks three people to trust each other, often after only a few conversations. That trust has to be earned, and the habits below are how you earn it and how you protect yourself while you do. They apply to couples and singles equally, and they matter most for a single woman meeting a couple, who carries the most risk of anyone in the arrangement.

Real people, not bots

Fake profiles are a familiar frustration for anyone looking for a third online. Your strongest test is a live video hello before any arrangement: a real couple or a real single will happily spend ten minutes saying hello, while a bot cannot and a scammer will always find a reason not to. The full list of warning signs, from copied openers to "verification" links, is in our guide to spotting fake threesome profiles and bots. When you find one, report it so it can be removed for everyone else.

Money requests and romance scams

No genuine person on 3Threesomes will ask you to pay them anything. Not for a bus or plane ticket to visit you. Not for a hotel deposit. Not for a "verification fee" that supposedly proves you are safe. Not for gift cards, cryptocurrency or a phone top-up. Not to help with an emergency, however sad.

If it happens, go silent, block them and send a report. Do not argue or try to catch them out. Scammers are practised at turning a conversation back towards the request. A genuine person will understand that you never pay someone you have yet to meet.

Verifying that a couple is a couple

Singles, especially women, deserve to be sure that a couple profile stands for two partners who are equally keen. Ask for a video call with both of them present. Watch how they talk to each other and to you. Does each partner speak for themselves? Do they agree on what they are looking for? A couple where one partner seems reluctant, silent or absent is a couple where the other partner may be speaking for both. That is not consent, and it is a good reason to walk away.

Couples can earn trust in the same way: by offering the video call before the single has to ask, by both writing messages, and by stating their agreements clearly.

Reporting and blocking

You can block or report members whenever something feels wrong.

Blocking stops someone contacting you. Use it any time you want contact to stop, for whatever reason. You do not need to explain.

Reporting sends the profile to our team. Each report is reviewed, and profiles found breaking our standards come down. Report anyone who:

1. asks for money, gift cards, fares or fees of any kind;
2. ignores a no, or keeps returning to something you have refused;
3. sends explicit images you did not ask for;
4. uses photos that are not theirs or claims to be a couple without a partner;
5. shares, or threatens to share, someone's photos, name or address;
6. appears to be under 18, or talks about involving anyone under 18.

If anything you see suggests someone is in immediate danger, contact local emergency services first. In the US, that number is 911.

Privacy for couples with careers and families

Discretion is a common reason couples and singles choose a dedicated site, and it is worth protecting from the first day.

• Photos: choose images you would be comfortable with a stranger seeing. Avoid backgrounds that show your home, your car's plate, your workplace or your children's belongings.
• Text: describe your area broadly. A metro area is enough; a street or neighbourhood is too much.
• Contact details: use a separate email address for dating. Share a phone number only after a video call, and consider a second number for dating if you use one.
• Social media: do not link accounts that show your full name, and be wary of anyone who searches for you before you have met.
• Photos you receive: never share them, screenshot them for others or keep them after someone asks you to delete them.

Consent rules on the site

Consent on 3Threesomes means every adult involved agrees, willingly and clearly, and any one of them can withdraw at any moment. That applies to messages, to photos, to the plan for a date and to everything that happens on one. Being a couple does not give two people a stronger vote than the single. Saying yes earlier does not mean yes later. A no is complete without a reason.

We remove profiles that pressure people, that push past stated limits or that treat a single as a service rather than a person.

Safer first meetings

Make the first meeting public, short and without expectations:

• Meet somewhere busy, such as a bar, café or hotel lobby.
• Arrive and leave under your own steam.
• Give a friend the venue and the hour you plan to head off.
• Keep your drink with you.
• Agree in advance that anyone can leave without explaining.

More detail on the first date itself is in the vibe check and the first meet.

Sexual health before a meet

Talk about sexual health before anyone is in a bedroom together. Agree on barrier methods, and talk about when each of you was last tested. In the United States, the CDC's GetTested locator lists HIV, STI and hepatitis testing services near you. Our country guides name the matching public services in the United Kingdom, Canada and Australia.

Feeling unsafe at a meeting

Go. Nobody is owed a reason or the rest of your night. Go somewhere busy, call the friend who knows where you are, and arrange your own way home. If you are in danger, call the emergency number where you are, which is 911 in the United States. Once you are safe, write down what happened while it is fresh and report the profile on 3Threesomes, so it can be reviewed. If a crime has taken place, the police can advise you, and keeping the messages will help them.